Sure, It's the Coldest Winter in Years...

One of the great things about living in Southern California is that you can go to the snow.

Did you catch that?

Go to the snow.

Yes, it's true. I can get in my car in the winter time and drive an hour to the mountains and enjoy the snow. I never have to worry about the snow coming to me.

No shovelling sidewalks, no frozen pipes, no crushing heating bills, no salt crusted roads. It's kind of awesome.

Today, we got in the Jeep and drove to Big Bear to play in the snow. It's the last day of Christmas vacation for Tabitha and the kids so we thought it might be fun.

We went to an area called Magic Mountain where for an exchange of a few dollars, they allow you to sign your life away and ride an inner tube down a groomed snow covered hill. We packed all of our warm clothes but didn't need them because it was about fifty degrees.

Wheee!

It's not as steep as it looks.

What's Aidan doing with that snowball?

Fight!

Run away.

An accidental self-portrait. Look how blue the sky is.

It looks like he's holding a tiny inner tube on his shoulder.

Abigail loved it.

Getting ready for a run.

What's going through that evil little mind.

The magic carpet ride.

Try It

Last Wednesday, Tabitha and I arranged for a baby sitter to watch the kids so we could have a date. Charlotte, a maid at the hotel, arrived at our room at 4:00 PM and took custody of the children. Tabitha and I drove to Rum Point on the north side of Grand Cayman.

We walked out on the pier and watched the snorkelers splashing in the water.

We sat in the shade of palm trees on the beach and sipped drinks. Tabitha had a bright blue margarita and I drank a virgin pina colada. After a while, we climbed back in the car and drove to the south side of the island to have dinner at a restaurant called The Lighthouse.

The Lighthouse is one of those fine dining establishments with impeccable service, an extensive wine list, and food prepared with the finest local ingredients by a renowned chef. Not my usual eatery.

We arrived a little early for our reservation but were seated immediately in the screened patio overlooking the breaking surf. The waiter suggested we try the drink special of the night, a blood orange mojito. We did.

A little background:

I am a picky eater. My past memories of eating at restaurants always include a special order. Not the "I'm going to order food that isn't on the menu because I'm a rich ass and I want to show these people how powerful I am" but the "I don't like very much and I'm afraid to try new things" special order. Things like french fries with the steak and plain hamburgers.

Boring.

Lately, I have tried to be more adventurous. I like to try local specialities when we travel and I'm more willing to trust the skills of the chef.

This caught my eye on the specials menu:

Jerk blue nose grouper with avocado salsa, garlic mashed potatoes, veggies, and fried plantain.

This was about the best thing I have ever tasted. I tried the grouper by itself and it was good. I tried it with the avocado salsa and it was heavenly. It was so good, I memorialized it with a photo:

Secrets

The other day Tabitha was looking on Expedia for vacation ideas. She told me she was having trouble finding some of the smaller resorts. Expedia seems to focus primarily on larger resorts and chains.

After a while, she told me she found something. I was doing something else so I didn't have time to look. A few minutes later, I asked her what she wanted to show me. She said, "Nevermind."

The next day I saw a charge for Expedia on our checking account. I put two and two together and asked if she made a reservation.

She did. But she's not telling. (She actually offered to tell me but I declined)

I've got a birthday coming up and our 13th anniversary is only two days after that. The best birthday / anniversary present I can think of is a couple of days alone with Tabitha. That and a Porsche 911 GT3 but I'll take the time alone with Tabitha.

I can't wait.

What's the First Thing That Pops Into Your Head...

I'm taking a class this week for work. On Tuesday we had a section dealing with diabetes.

I'm something of an expert.

The instructor, a Medical Doctor, asked the class if anyone had a family member with diabetes. I raised my hand. He pointed to me and said, "What's the first thing that pops into your head about diabetes?"

I froze. My head was immediately flooded with thoughts.


Low blood sugar

Tabitha

Transplant

Car accident

Aidan and Abigail

9-1-1

Shots

Doctor's appointments

Blood tests

Neuropathy

Eye surgery

Coma

Sweat

Glucose

Worries


The instructor yelled, "Pick something."

"Insulin" I replied and he moved on to the next person.

Snow Trip

On Saturday afternoon, I woke up from my nap. Tab looked at me and said, "We should go to the mountains and spend the night so the kids can play in the snow." I agreed so we leaped into action.

Three hours later we were finally on the road (packed bags, got in the car, stopped at Starbucks, drove to the in-laws house to pick up porta-crib, got dinner from Carl's Jr., returned to our house to fix insulin pump, and finally started driving to Arrowhead).

Tab looked for a room in Big Bear but couldn't find anything. With about a foot of new snow I thought that might be a problem. She did find us a room at the Lakeview Lodge in Lake Arrowhead. It's a Victorian inn overlooking the lake just around the corner from the Village.

We woke Sunday morning to falling snow. We hurriedly checked out of the inn to avoid disturbing the other guests and had breakfast at Belgian Waffle Works. After breakfast we fed the ducks in the lake. As soon as we stepped outside with the paper bags of duck food, the ducks flocked in our direction.

I wanted to drive to Big Bear to go to one of the snow play areas but an accident stopped traffic on the highway. We turned around and stopped at Snow Valley. One hundred dollars later we had four lift tickets to use the sledding area.

It was snowing and the clouds rolled in while we were sledding.

After about an hour, Tabitha and Abigail gave up and went inside to warm up. Aidan and I took a few more rides. His cheeks were red and his nose was running but he loved it. It was a good time.

She's Been Waiting for the Day

Tab has wanted a place where she could go and work on her art away from the hustle and bustle of her needy husband and children. She had hoped to use part of the garage, but the garage is the repository of all the junk acquired over 12 years of marriage so there wasn't much room left for creativity.

And then I told Tab about an article in the New York Times about hip-young couples buying prefab modernist sheds to put in their backyards. They use these sheds/studios/retreats/playhouses/get-aways to store stuff, create art, retreat, play, or get-away. What a cool idea.

This mention along with an idea long-simmering in her mind caused a flurry activity now known as the "Great Backyard Structure Search" (the GBSS). About two weeks later, Tuff-Shed built a not so modernist 10 foot by 12 foot shed in our backyard.

She really likes it. Now I just have to fulfill my promise to get electricity to the studio.

Cheesy Pick-up Lines From a Two-Year-Old?

Tabitha was in the bedroom this morning when Aidan asked her, "So, what's your name?"

Happy Birthday Tabitha

Happy Birthday Baby.

July 4th in August

We had our annual 4th of July family reunion last weekend at Uncle Hank's. Lots of family I haven't seen in a while (or ever). Mom took the train down from Montana to visit with us and to attend the party. She only stayed with us for 3 short days. But we had fun.

I took her to In-N-Out for lunch.

Tabitha and Aidan watching the fun in the pool.

I was probably ten years old before I jumped off this diving board. Abigail jumped, swam to the side and did it again. Over and over.

Two very handsome men sitting by the pool.

That kid is hard to pin down.

"No More Mini"

Last night Tabitha had low blood sugar while driving the kids back from Fontana. She remembers getting on the east bound 60 freeway in Rubidoux and then the rest is just a fog. The CHP tried to stop what they thought was a drunk driver. They realized she had a medical issue and dropped back.

The car finally came to a stop when she ran into a light pole at 50 miles per hour on an on-ramp to the 10 freeway in Cabazon.




The pole fell on top of the car.





Thankfully, neither Tabitha nor the kids have any serious injuries. Aidan seems to be the most shook up. He was angry with Mommy for making him bite his tongue. He will be okay.


Thank you Mini for giving up your life to protect my family.

A Small Victory?

In the battle of the sexes, victory is measured by...?



Not ground gained, enemy combatants killed, or total annihilation of the enemy. If you treat a relationship like a battle, then there can be no victory.



That being said...



Tabitha told me the other day that she was going to get all three "National Treasure" movies and watch them this week. I said there were only two "National Treasure" movies. She looked at me with pitying eyes and said that no, there were, in fact, three movies. I said I was pretty sure there were only two.



Today she told me she watched "National Treasure" with Abigail and that, yes, there were only two "National Treasure" movies.



I'm not gloating. I'm only putting it on record because it is very rare that I'm correct.

Twelve Years Ago Today...

...Tabitha Herrity became my wife.

She is even more beautiful today.

A Prediction Comes True

A soothsayer once said to his wife upon the contemplation of having children, "I'm worried I'll never have any privacy in the bathroom."

I'm not often right but I was right on this one.

Some Time Alone

Tabitha and I celebrated her spring break by taking a short trip to Ojai. We left the kids with our babysitter Liz and enjoyed 28 hours together. It was awesome.

Tabitha and I have a history of staying short periods of time at resorts we can't afford. Add the Ojai Valley Resort and Spa to the list. Wow! I think I have a new favorite hotel. It's nice.

It's almost too nice for us working stiffs. The hotel is a Spanish style resort spread across oak studded hills. They seem to be going for golfing husbands and spa-ing wives. We didn't golf and we didn't go to the spa but we still had a good time.

We drove the Mini into Ojai that night and came across a wine shop. We were dumbfounded by the extensive collection of beers and ciders. I have never seen so many Belgian ales in one place. It was very hard to narrow our choices down.

After breakfast the next morning, we rented bicycles from the pro-shop for a ride into town. We pedaled through the resort to an oak lined bike trail. Once in town we stopped at the Arcade to browse through the shops.

Most of the shops were boutiques featuring clothing for wealthy old ladies. Not really our thing. We did find a toy store and a shop offering products from merry old England. That's more our speed.

We returned to our bikes and found that our bike lock had jammed. After struggling with the lock for 15 minutes, we gave up and walked back to the hotel. The pro-shop was apologetic when I told them we had to abandon their bicycles in town. The bikes were still chained to the bike rack 2 hours later when we left town. They might still be there.

It's funny how you look forward to some time away from the kids, but then talk about them almost the whole time. In spite of the unnatural connection we have with our children, it sure is nice to spend some time away from them. Maybe next year, schedule permitting, Tabitha and I can spend a little time alone again. We'll go for 29 hours.

The Light at the End of the Tunnel, Maybe

Tabitha has been seeing a nephrologist for a few years now. The doctor monitors her blood for certain proteins that indicate the health of her kidneys. She has to limit her intake of calcium and potassium to reduce the strain on her kidneys. She lives a normal, if somewhat tired, life.

The good news is that Tabitha does not currently need dialysis. But it looms in her future. The other good news(?) is that her kidneys are damaged enough that they can do a transplant.

Last fall her nephrologist started screening her for a kidney/pancreas transplant. For the past several months Tabitha has undergone a battery of tests to determine her overall health. It turns out that she is pretty healthy in spite of having diabetes for 25 years.

Yesterday we met with the transplant team for the first time. They explained what is involved in an organ transplant. Once Tabitha is placed on the transplant list we will likely have to wait 2-3 years for her transplant, but an organ could become available any time. We have to be ready to go.

One person's loss of life becomes our gain.

When the transplant is complete, Tabitha will have to take several anti-rejection medications that will suppress her immune system. These medications have side effects. What she won't have to take is insulin. Her donor pancreas will produce the insulin her body requires. She won't have diabetes after her transplant.

So now we wait.

You Take the Good, You Take the Bad...

In 2001, after three years of trying, we found out Tabitha was pregnant. Because of Tabitha's diabetes, she had a high risk of developing complications. Tabitha and our baby might not survive the pregnancy.

After months of check-ups, badgering from the diabetes nurse, and many missed days of work, Tabitha woke up early one morning with severe back pain. We gathered up her things and drove to the hospital. When she arrived, they took her vitals and hustled her up to the delivery room. It was a month before the due date, but Tabitha's blood pressure was reaching dangerous levels.

The OB decided to induce labor.

Six hours later our little miracle entered the world. They immediately took Abigail to the NICU to stabilize her blood sugar levels. Tabitha was moved to recovery before she had a chance to see Abigail. It was two days before Tabitha's blood pressure dropped enough where she could hold Abigail.

Abigail was healthy but the pregnancy had damaged Tabitha's already weakened kidneys.

An Explanation Of Sorts

Tabitha was diagnosed with Type 1 (Juvenile) Diabetes when she was 11 years old. Her mother noticed that she was constantly thirsty, had to go to the bathroom all of the time, and was losing weight. After about two weeks in the hospital, Tabitha was stable enough to go home.

But life had changed.

An intelligent, active, out-going girl who believed she could do anything suddenly had to deal with a chronic disease. People acted differently around her. Some of her friends stopped hanging around with her. Tabitha's teachers and parents started treating her with kid gloves.

Every diabetic eventually suffers from the same complications. Diabetics are prone to heart disease, blindness, amputations due to neuropathy, and kidney failure. By keeping tight control on their blood sugar, they can delay the onset of the complications as long as possible.

Insulin is a hormone that allows our bodies to metabolize carbohydrates. In Tabitha's case, her pancreas stopped producing insulin. If she doesn't take insulin, her blood sugar will rise out of control. This high blood sugar is what eventually causes the complications.

Another problem is hypoglycemia, low blood sugar. If she takes too much insulin, doesn't eat enough, or exercises too much her blood sugar can drop to dangerous levels. If she drops low enough she could go into a coma.

When Tabitha was first diagnosed with diabetes, insulin was like carpet bombing. It wasn't very precise. She had to balance two types of insulin that had different durations of effectiveness. She had to eat the right amounts of food at the right time. A sugary dessert could throw her levels completely out of whack. Insulin is now like a precision guided bomb - just the right amount, at just the right time. But it's still not as good as your healthy body producing its own insulin.

When she was pregnant with Abigail, Tabitha's doctor changed the insulin to a type that allowed her to tailor her insulin levels more closely to what she actually ate. It was closer to how a healthy body delivers insulin. This was much more effective but she was still very "brittle."

"Brittle" describes a diabetic who is very sensitive to insulin. If she exerts herself just a little more than normal or doesn't eat enough, her blood sugars drop. Several times, Tabitha's students have had to run to the office because she was acting "funny." Finally, last year she got an insulin pump.

The insulin pump is a small electronic device that delivers a programmed dose of insulin sub-cutaneously every hour - this is the "basal" rate. At meal times, Tabitha enters her blood sugar level and the anticipated number of carbohydrates she is going to eat. The pump then recommends an amount of insulin to cover the meal - this is the "bolus." The pump has allowed Tabitha to have much more control over her blood sugar levels.

But there's still a problem.