Strong Enough?

Last week when Abigail was sick, we were watching TV downstairs. When it was time to head upstairs for bed she said, "Carry me Daddy." I tried to make excuses like, "Daddy's back hurts. You can walk." Her reply was, "Daddy, you're strong enough."

I carried her upstairs.

Profitable? Good? Necessary.

I was reading some comments on the OC Register's blog a few weeks ago. A commenter wrote that recycling plans are a waste of money. They are not profitable and must be subsidized by the government. He wrote that we are not in danger of running out of landfills, we are only in danger of running out of nearby landfills. We will just have to ship our garbage further afield in the future.

Hmmm?

We live in a society that lives and dies by the (not so) mighty dollar. In the eyes of many, an enterprise must be profitable in order to have merit. If something is not profitable it is not worth doing. I disagree.

While making profit is necessary for enterprises to exist in the long term, a portion of those profits should be used to subsidize activities which are not profitable. Certain enterprises are not profitable but are necessary for our continued existence on this planet. While it is true that it is not profitable to recycle some items (plastics generally), the alternative is a planet filled with our refuse.

Who cares?

Our children will care. Our grandchildren will care. Our great-grandchildren will care. The people who live where we are going to ship our garbage will care.

Mmmmm! VIII

About four years ago I became obsessed with baking bread. I've always been obsessed with bread but I hadn't really tried to bake it. Every week for about a month I baked a couple of loaves. I was getting pretty good at it until I made a loaf of oatmeal bread and forgot to put in the salt. It was not very good; actually it was horrible. It is amazing how a little salt can change a loaf of bread from a bland lump to a tasty treat.

For Christmas three years ago I got a Kitchen Aid Mixer, the kind with a bread hook for kneading dough. You might think that I immediately whipped up a loaf of yeasty, crusty bread. You would be wrong. I used the mixer to make pancakes but mostly it just sat on the counter next to the coffee maker. Tabitha used it quite a bit but I didn't.

Last weekend I got a bee in my bonnet. I have bread flour, whole wheat flour, and oat flour. I had the raw materials for making bread. I found a few recipes for bread but most use all-purpose flour. I prefer bread flour because it has more gluten, making the bread less crumbly. I was stressing about the flour.

And then I thought, "It's just bread. If you have the flour, yeast, liquid, salt and sugar it's going to be fine." So I modified a recipe from the Kitchen Aid recipe book. I used bread flour instead of all-purpose. I used brown sugar instead of white. I incorporated some whole-wheat flour instead of just using white. You know what? It turned out just fine.

Actually, it's probably the best bread I have yet baked. It tastes good, it has a nice crust, and it smells awesome. Abigail, who doesn't normally like crust said, "Daddy, I love this crust." The reviews are in and critics agree - the bread rules.

One thing is kind of weird though. I love cheese and I love bread. I love to eat cheese while eating bread. But I don't like cheese bread. Go figure.

We are now Wireless

Now I can use my laptop as it was intended. I'm no longer tied to the desk.

Another Thought

A baggy shirt doesn't make you look skinnier. It just makes you look like a fat guy wearing a baggy shirt.

I Was Thinking...

... it might be a little easier to run if I wasn't carrying around an extra 25 pounds.

Umm... What was the Question?

I was listening to an interview of a psychiatrist, Edward Hallowell, on the radio a while ago. He wrote a book called Driven to Distraction about adults with Attention Deficit Disorder. As I listened to his description of the characteristics of adults with ADD, I thought "that sounds like me." So I bought the book.

I started to read Driven to Distraction and then got distracted. It sat on the shelf for about a year when I decided I should finish it. It shined a light on many of the things I have felt while growing up. These are symptoms of Adult ADD from Wikipedia:

- A sense of underachievement, of not meeting one's goals (regardless of how much one has actually accomplished). Yeah.
- Difficulty getting organized. Oh, yeah.
- Chronic procrastination or trouble getting started. Where do I begin?
- Many projects going simultaneously; trouble with follow through. Yep.
- A tendency to say what comes to mind without necessarily considering the timing or appropriateness of the remark. Open mouth, insert foot.
- A frequent search for high stimulation. Not so much this one.
- An intolerance of boredom. Yes.
- Easy distractability; trouble focusing attention, tendency to tune out or drift away in the middle of a page or conversation, often coupled with an inability to focus at times. I'm sorry, what were we talking about?
- Trouble in going through established channels and following "proper" procedure. I'll do it my way.
- Impatient; low tolerance of frustration. Okay, maybe a little.
- Impulsive, either verbally or in action, as an impulsive spending of money. Maybe you should ask Tabitha.
- Changing plans, enacting new schemes or career plans and the like; hot-tempered. Not really.
- Physical or cognitive restlessness. Does a bouncing leg and drumming fingers count?
- A tendency toward addictive behaviour. If french fries are an addiction then yes.
- Chronic problems with self-esteem. Yeah.
- Inaccurate self-observation. Not me.

As a child in school I was always a step behind in the classroom. When the teacher asked me a question I usually had no idea what she had been talking about. I was lost in my own little world. Every school year I told myself that I would work really hard and get good grades. I would usually do well for the first month or so and then I would slip back into my old patterns. There was always a gap between my test scores and my grades. I tested well, particularly in reading, but had mediocre grades because I failed to turn in assignments.

I've talked to my Dad about this. As a child I remember lots of unfinished projects around the house. He was also a day-dreamer in school. I watch Abigail and how she behaves, and I see the same issues rearing their ugly heads in her. At least for Abigail we know what to look for. For my Dad and me, there was no answer to our problems other than "Pay attention," "sit still," or "if only you would try harder."

Imagine how frustrating it is for Tabitha, a highly organized, high achieving planner, to live with me. I'm unorganized, I don't plan ahead, and I procrastinate. I have trouble relating to people in social situations and am constantly saying things or behaving in ways that embarass her. She calls me a "social moth."

I look at the symptoms and they seem to fit my situation, but it is impossible to accurately diagnose a condition in yourself. I need to make an appointment with the psychiatrist, but I keep putting it off.

It's Raining

I really enjoy the rain. At least when I don't have to be outside in it. Because we receive so little rain here and always seem to be in a drought I never complain about the rain.

We've Created a Monster

Aidan thinks it's hilarious when he pretends to burp.

Another Thought

While cucumber and zucchini look similar, they are not interchangeable.

It's Like a Christening...

... only there's no water involved and he wasn't wearing a frilly dress. We celebrated Aidan's baby dedication at church tonight. Bill and Hillary Catling were our dedicating couple. Here are a few photos.

The Tooth Fairy...

...visited Abigail for the second time last night. This time she got a Susan B. Anthony dollar. The Tooth Fairy is very generous these days.

I Like Manchester United...

... but I don't like Manchester United the same way the red part of Manchester does. I can't. I wasn't born there. I've never been to a game with my grandad, father or my mates. I didn't grow up following them through the bad times of the seventies and the glory times of the nineties. I came to my love of ManUtd late and a continent away.

Football clubs in other parts of the world are not like professional sports teams in the United States. Football clubs in England grew organically in their community. Manchester United Football Club started in 1878 as the Newton Heath Cricket and Football Club, a sports club of the Lancashire and Yorkshire Railway Company. The name was changed to Manchester United Football Club in 1902. ManUtd have been playing their home matches at Old Trafford since about 1910.

I became aware of ManUtd when I was in college watching the UEFA Champions League, the European club championship. I saw players like Mark Hughes, Steve Bruce, Paul Ince, Andy Cole, and Ryan Giggs. When I started watching the English Premier League consistently in 2002, I struggled with deciding which team to support. ManUtd seemed an obvious choice but I didn't want to just jump on the bandwagon.

My father-in-law is from Birmingham. I always drink coffee from a Birmingham City FC mug when I'm at their house but he isn't really a soccer fan. The only soccer game he attended as a child was an Aston Villa match. He remembers the Aston Villa supporters, in an ale soaked rage, destroying the train on the way home from the match.

I thought about supporting Hartlepool United FC, a team known for their mediocrity. They have never won any major trophies, but have also never been relegated out of the Football League. They are not good and they are not bad. I like that. The problem with a club like Hartlepool United is I would never get to see them play. They play in the lower divisions and are seldom on television.

So, being free from the constraints of geography and familial loyalty, I chose ManUtd.

I know a little about the rivalries. As a ManUtd supporter, I am supposed to hate Liverpool. I don't hate them though. I want them to lose to ManUtd every time they play but I don't hate them. I'm supposed to hate Arsenal also. Okay, I do hate Arsenal. I'm supposed to hate Manchester City FC (the blue half of the city), but I can't get too worked up about them.

I'm not from England and I'm not from Manchester. I'm not even English. I'm an American who likes watching exciting soccer. ManUtd plays exciting soccer. ManUtd has exciting players - Rooney, Tevez, Ronaldo, Giggs, Anderson, Scholes, Vidic, and Ferdinand. ManUtd has an intense, interesting manager in Sir Alex Ferguson. Sir Alex always seems as if he is going to explode. ManUtd have won a lot of trophies but only a few since I started following them. They will probably win many more.

What a View

Would you believe it if I told you the view of Mt. San Gorgonio this afternoon was stunning? The recent storm dropped a light dusting of snow starting around the 5000 foot level. The gray clouds hung around the base of the mountain shielding parts of it from view while the setting sun lit up the mountaintop in a blaze of light. The air was so clear it didn't seem like it could be real. Where was the haze we are so used to?

I was having trouble paying attention to the road it was so beautiful. I didn't have my camera but any photograph I would have taken would not have come close to capturing what we saw this afternoon. Days like this are rare here so we have to appreciate them when they come.

What's that Smell?

I just went to the bathroom and was reminded that I had asparagus for dinner.

Home Sick

Abigail picked up whatever virus is going around her school. Last weekend she had a fever so I took her to the doctor. She had a raging ear infection. She's had a fever off and on all week so I have been staying home with her. We can't risk getting the other kids at the babysitter sick.

They are starting to wonder at work if I am ever coming back.

Darn You Inner Monologue

Every time I check in at the airport I have to fight the urge to make a joke such as, "I left my bomb (or gun) at home today, thanks." Every time. So far I haven't said anything but I don't know how long I can hold out.

Our Kids Like to Exercise

Aidan and Abigail like to walk on the treadmill. Abigail walks at two miles per hour while Aidan only goes one mile per hour. He has short legs. Who needs to go outside in the rain?

Perception is (My) Reality

What number do you see? I see a bunch of dots.

It turns out that I'm colorblind. Just a little bit. You know those colored dot tests where the colored dots are supposed to make a number, they don't always make a number for me. I was kind of shocked because I've seen colors my entire life. I know the difference between red and green and yellow and blue and orange and pink.

I see 45. What do you see?

When I went to join the Navy almost 20 years ago, I scored really well on the ASVAB test (Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery). They were trying to get me into one of the nuclear programs. I wasn't all that interested because I wanted to be a journalist or photographer. When they found out I was slightly colorblind, they pulled those offers off the table and gave me nothing. And I still joined. What was I thinking?

I know the difference between Ferrari red and Aston Martin green. I have never mistaken a fire truck for a forest service truck. I have never attached the red wire to the green wire. But apparently I don't see these colors the way they really are. I see them through the filter of my cock-eyed mind.

I can still appreciate a cloudy sky as much as a clear blue sky. I just don't know what they really look like.

I Ran so Far Today

Okay, it was just three miles in 30 minutes on the treadmill. At least now I can say I have actually used the treadmill for a run.